This week’s bowling has been interesting and not in a good way. Because of a faulty lanes we are still in the middle if the second game. Every time someone throws on lane 43, it registers a gutterball on lane 44. Oy vey.

Ok, it looks like we’re going to get them to move us to lanes that work properly. Update soon.

Sent from my iPhone.

*** OK ***

Now it’s the next day. Live blogging is fun, but once we moved lanes we were trying to hurry along: no time for shenanigans. Anyway. The lanes conspired against us, I am terrible at bowling, and we lost all three games. Arg.

Tonight was the last week of the first half of the Bill Porter Memorial League, the last chance to make a run at first place. Our awesome bowling last week and sweep of 7 points put us in second place coming into tonight. With two other teams tied with us for second and us one point out of first place, it was going to be a struggle. But it wasn’t just solely a battle with the the other teams, it was also a battle between Brandon and Andrew who were tied going into this week, and Bob, only three points behind them. Let the battle begin!!

We were teamed up with the Flying Pins, who had the same handicap as us, therefore, it was going to be a scratch game. We annihilated them in the first game beating them by over 100 pins. All four of us shot above our average and so Brandon and Andrew were still tied.

The second game was a different story, though. Both Bob and I fell apart and were each a little over 20 pins shy of our average. Brandon also failed to shoot his average. The only one of us that did was Andrew. Omigoodness, Andrew pulled into the lead! Because the three of us did not fare so well, we ended up giving the second game to the Flying Pins. Crap, we were hoping for a sweep in order to cinch first place. Now all we could do is hope that we win the third game and pray the other teams did not win 5 points.

The third game was a vast improvement and three out of four shot above our averages and we won the last game by 52 pins. Due to Andrew’s superior bowling skills and amount of trash-talking, Brandon couldn’t handle it and buckled under pressure. Andrew has triumphed and won the bet!!! Yeah Andrew!

Now, because of the closeness of the teams, we had to stick around and see how the other two teams fared against each other. BP’s House needed to win their third game big to come up with 3 points, and Chuck Bales came up big with a 247 to secure the overall against Abducted. With the third game in hand, we knew we were winner for the first half, which guaranteed us a chance to roll for first place in the league after the second half. We are a force to be reckoned with, I mean, really, we were the newbies on the league and now, they know they can’t mess with us or else we’ll strike with our fangs and our bowling balls! Tee-hee!

Go Team Snakes!!! HISSSS!!!

Yea! Snakes on a Lane are back and we’re ready to strike! (Get it? Bowling? Strikes? Snakes? They strike? Tee-hee, har-har, I’m so funny!) Okay, so after some drama last Tuesday, we have finally settled on a Monday night league at Strike-n-Spare called the Bill Porter Memorial League. I have no idea who Bill Porter was and tried looking him up but with no avail. Oh, well. It’s a league and we get to bowl.

After four months of not bowling for all of us, it was not a good start to the season, or maybe it was, meaning a huge handicap. I’ll put it in perspective for you how bad it was on our first night out on the lanes. Now, remember, we haven’t bowled seriously in four months and this is a new house, but really?

Brandon – Last season: 192 average. Monday night: 163 average.
Andrew – Last season: 166 average. Monday night: 129 average.
Bob – Last season: 171 average. Monday night: 154 average.
Jen – Last season: 149 average. Monday night: 160 average.

Apparently, I was the only one who decided to show up to bowl that night. Now, Brandon mentioned that he bowled terribly with his other league so his average here is very close to his average at the other house. Bob only pulled out a 154 average because he decided to remember how to bowl and bowled a 202 in his last game. Andrew, poor Andrew. He reverted back to how he was when we first bowled together 2 1/2 years ago, which was VERY POORLY.

Okay, it was the first week and somehow we still pulled off 5 points. But you guys are not slight of build so I can’t carry you through the rest of the season, I’m only 5’3 and *** pounds!

After a huge scare last week in which I allowed Brandon to come with one point of me in the Bet, I kicked it up a notch and bowled my booty off. We started off well, with two of us bowling over our averages and two just shy of it. But we couldn’t overcome the Fabulous 4 with one teammate bowling 44 pins over his average. That was okay, though, we still had a potential to win 5 points. Second game: we all bowled over our averages (it’s been a long, long time since that has happened) and for sure we thought we had them but somehow, they got that game as well. Let’s just try and get at least two points…we can do it. Last game, two of us bowled over our averages and two did not so when the other team earned two points, we couldn’t blame anybody but ourselves for our disappointing showing. Lost 7 points, very sad.

So while Brandon was pouting, he put Bob in charge of adding up the scores and that was when things got interesting. Bob couldn’t figure out why the numbers weren’t adding up to what was on the screen.  Apparently he had drank a bit too much beer.  After quite of bit of chattering, we found out that the other team had put their handicap in the computer incorrectly, thereby giving themselves more of a handicap, which means…we really won 5 points! Woo-hoo! We’re not losers after all. Hopefully, these points will keep us in the top  because we want to win some money!

And by the way, because of my awesomeness at bowling, I am now five points ahead of Brandon in the Bet.  Let’s hope I don’t eff it up in the last week of bowling.

After sufficiently shaming Brandon and Andrew for not taking seven points from Chops et al, we came in this week ready to defend our first place. We were competing against Mayo and his team. He was very serious about his bowling that he wouldn’t even let us put the football game on our screen, it would be too distracting. Well even without it, we still beat them so nah-nah-nah-boo-boo!

I guess Bob and I were still on vacation during the first game because we did not bowl our average. Luckily, our captain saved the day. Brandon decided that this was the game that he was going to bowl like a rock star. First frame: strike. Second frame: strike. Third frame: strike. Nothing unusual with a turkey. Fourth frame: strike. Hambone. Not bad. Fifth frame: strike. Well, he’s on a streak. Sixth frame: strike. Don’t ask about his $600 from Motel 6, we might jinx him. Seventh frame: strike. You only need 5 more strikes! Eighth frame: strike. Everyone is watching him now. But we’re not saying anything to him about it, as if he wasn’t SO CLOSE to a perfect game. Ninth frame: strike. Holy crap!!!! Ten frame: no one is breathing as he walked up to the lane. All eyes are fixated on him and what he was going to throw. He takes his approach, releases the ball and then…9. The entire house groaned, then applauded his streak. And to add salt to the wound, he missed his spare. Still, 9 in a row and a 267. Not too shabby. A good thing too, since only he and Andrew made their averages. We ended up winning by 78 though.

Second game, Jen and Andrew came back and both earned two points with a 179 and a 197, respectively. Bob continued to scuffle along, 9 points under average. Brandon had decided that the first game was good enough for him, coming in one point under average. Spare Parts bowled 58 pins better than the first game, but we still held on to win by 18.

Third game was a big one for the Snakes as Jen and Bob earned two points and Brandon and Andrew each earned one, with the team coming in 754 scratch and 860 handicap to win by 90 and secure all seven points for the team. We remained in first place and continue our romp through the second half next week again Mr. Tight Pants.

The Bits-n-Pieces League always has a holiday party right before Christmas, which basically means that every team has to bring something to share. Of course, we were too lazy to actually make something, Bob ran out and got a veggie tray from Sams (it’s a great veggie tray). And as part of the spirit of giving, the team we bowled that night was generous enough to give us 7 points. So, yeah, we kicked booty that night. Of course, there was a little bit of drama involved to make the night more interesting. Brandon decided to liven up the party by falling onto the lane when he went up to bowl, twice. We are talking about throwing himself down the lane. It was pretty scary, but he was a true athlete, he just got up and bowled again with no complaints. Unlike the other team, where this one guy kept complaining about our strikes and how we all didn’t deserve them. Wah-wah! Andrew finally woke up and bowled like himself, earning 4 points.  Bob came out of the gate roaring in the first game, went to raid the food table during the second game, when he was full, he came back to bowl in the third, so 3 points for him.  Brandon was unable to obtain any points for the week, due to the fact that he was injured.  And then there’s me.  Yea, me.  I beat the boys in the second game (I was very excited about that) and bowled well in the third.  We won’t mention the first game.  That means, 4 points for me.  Merry Christmas to all of us.

Well, week 6 was definately a down week from the team stand point. Going up against Spare parts, 8th place (18-17), proved rather difficult. Not only did we give them 60 sticks a game in handicap, but their 169 average bowler rolled his ass off. Actually, looking at the score sheet, all members of Spare parts were well over average. Damn sand-baggers. Haha, ok, thats just a shitty excuse for losing and I refuse to use it. We lost because we didn’t bowl well enough.

The first game was pretty close. While SoaL bowled around average or slightly over, Spare Parts was 82 pins over average. As I said before, add that to the 60 we game them, it makes it a struggle to keep up. However, we only lost by 31 pins. Jen: 158 Andrew: 167 Bob: 156 Brandon: 208

The second game, SoaL took a beating and lost by 66 bones. Andrew bounced back to hit his average while Bob and Brandon were pretty consistent. Jen fell asleep in the bathroom and missed four frames. Hehe. Jen: 95 Andrew: 182 Bob: 159 Brandon: 202

The third game, SoaL would seek revenge. SoaL will not be shut out, will not go home beaten, will not be embarrassed! Andrew again bowled over his average and Brandon as well, barely. Bob blew up and rolled 44 over his average, earning him an extra point for the bet. Jen, refreshed from her nap fought to get back to average but fell one point short. SoaL would win by 45 pins and take two points for the week. Jen: 140 Andrew: 182 Bob: 200 Brandon: 188.

And for the bet? Well, Bob’s big game puts him in the lead by one point. And while he seems pretty confident that he will remain the leader, we must remind him that there are still 9 weeks or so left of this contest. And I’m starting to hit my stride. Jen seems to have accepted that she will not win and is now rooting for Bob. And Andrew isn’t far behind and could make a push for that leader’s spot.

So you guys failed to post for your half of last week. What’s up with that? We gave you one job. ONE JOB!

OK, so this week started off pretty lousy. Two new teams joined the league, so the schedule was changed, which means that last week, we didn’t really bowl the team we bowled last week. So instead of winning 5 points, we’re winning 2 points last week. Bullshit, right?

Oh well.

Anyway, once we moved past the drama, we got down to bowling. We faced the Predators this weekend, and not even their heat seeking vision could the overcome two of their bowlers being absent and rolling blind (10 pins beneath average for each blind bowler). The first game, Snakes struck quickly, with everyone beating their average en route to a 825 handicap game to win by 77 pins. Second game was also pretty decent, with 3/4 besting their average and Predators bottoming out to end up with a 778 – 685 victory for the Snakes.

Third game was highly dramatic though. Jen, Bob and Andrew all bowled beneath their averages. Jen by 4 pins, Bob by 7, and Andrew by 73. No, that was not a typo. Andrew, who has been on fire this season, carried a 173 average into tonight. His first two games were 182 and 190. Awesome, right? Well, he ended up with a 100 on the button. Sheesh.

The game came down to the final bowlers, Will for the Predators and Brandon for Snakes. The Predators were ahead by 10 pins with Will on a spare and Brandon on a strike. That meant that Brandon had to strike out the 10th frame to guarantee a tie for the third game if Will struck out.

Brandon, first ball: STIRKE (yes!)
Will, first ball: STRIKE (oh crap oh crap)
Brandon, second ball: STRIKE (yes, yes, yes!)
Will, second ball: 8 (oh yes, holy crap, Brandon, keep it out of the gutter)
Brandon, third ball: STRIKE (OMG!!!!1!1!)
Will, third ball: spare

So, we won by 10 in the final game. Brandon saved his best bowling for the finale, rolling a 221, his best game of the year thus far. Snakes took all seven points. High fives around!

Next week, we start the bet. Of course, we know Andrew dropped that C-Note on us that third game to bring his average down to help with the bet. Regardless of his blatant sandbagging, we will be ready to roll next Sunday.

Scores: